People talk about rest as if it’s simple.
Just sit down.
Put your feet up.
Relax.
If you’re a mum with ADHD, you’ll probably already be laughing.
Because for many of us, resting our body and resting our brain are two completely different things.
I can sit perfectly still on the sofa and look like I’m resting.
Meanwhile my brain is holding seventeen conversations, planning tomorrow, replaying something I said three years ago, wondering what’s for dinner, and thinking about a blog post idea.
The body might be resting.
The brain definitely isn’t.
What Rest Actually Looks Like For Me
If I’m physically exhausted, you’ll usually find me under my weighted blanket.
There’s something about being completely wrapped up that helps my nervous system calm down after a busy day.
It’s one of the few things that reliably helps me slow down.
But if I need both my body and my brain to rest, that’s a different story.
One of my favourite ways to do that is watching a film with subtitles while I’m under my blanket.
Most people probably think subtitles are distracting.
For me, they’re the opposite.
They give my brain just enough to focus on that it stops trying to think about everything else.
For a little while, the noise quietens down.
And that’s surprisingly restful.
The Unexpected Things That Help My Brain Rest
One thing I’ve discovered over the years is that rest doesn’t always look like doing nothing.
Sometimes it looks like painting.
When I’m watercolour painting, something shifts.
My brain stops jumping between a hundred different thoughts and focuses on one thing.
It’s one of the few activities where I genuinely feel calm.
Another thing I love is 8D music.
If you’ve never tried it, put your headphones on, close your eyes, and just listen.
For me, it feels like the music is moving around my head in circles.
It’s hard to explain, but it seems to occupy all the busy parts of my brain at once.
For a little while, everything else fades into the background.
And for an ADHD brain, that’s quite a gift.
Burnout Taught Me The Hard Way
I used to think I could just keep pushing.
Take on more.
Do more.
Be more.
Keep going.
Eventually my body had other ideas.
A few years ago I took on too much responsibility at work.
At first, I thought I could handle it.
Then every day felt harder than the last.
I became more overwhelmed.
More exhausted.
More emotional.
Until eventually I hit complete burnout.
If you’ve experienced burnout, you’ll know it’s difficult to describe.
For me, it felt a bit like depression.
Some days my brain completely shut down.
Other days it went into a full negative spiral where everything felt difficult and overwhelming.
It wasn’t pretty.
But it taught me something important.
I am not invincible.
And that’s okay.
Learning To Spot The Signs
One thing that has changed since that burnout is that I understand myself better.
I know my warning signs now.
I know when I’ve been pushing too hard.
I know when I’ve ignored my need to transition between things.
I know when I’ve stretched my boundaries too far.
Most importantly, I’ve stopped expecting perfection from myself.
Not every day has to be productive.
Not every opportunity has to be accepted.
Not every responsibility has to belong to me.
That mindset alone has probably protected me from another burnout.
ADHD Makes Rest Complicated
One of the hardest things about ADHD is that even when you want to rest, your brain often has other plans.
You remember things.
You start planning things.
You hyperfocus on things.
You convince yourself you should be doing something useful.
It’s exhausting.
I’m still learning how to switch off before I reach breaking point.
I’m still learning that rest is preventative, not just something you do when you’re already burnt out.
And honestly, I’m still a work in progress.
We Are Not Machines
If there’s one thing I would say to another mum struggling to rest, it’s this:
You need time for yourself.
Not because you’ve earned it.
Not because you’ve finished everything.
Not because you’ve reached some magical point where all the jobs are done.
Because you’re human.
We are not machines.
We weren’t designed to run continuously without stopping.
And the sooner we accept that, the healthier we’ll be.
Final Thoughts
I’m still learning how to rest.
I’m still learning how to notice the warning signs before burnout arrives.
I’m still learning that slowing down isn’t the same thing as giving up.
But I’m getting better at it.
The weighted blanket.
The painting.
The film with subtitles.
The music.
The sleep.
They’re all reminders that rest doesn’t have to look the same for everyone.
It just has to work for you.
And if you’re a busy mum trying to do all the things for all the people, maybe this is your reminder that you deserve that rest too.
Looking for More Support?
The free library is a great place to start, but if you’d like access to the full collection of planners, business tools, templates and printables, you can join the Simply Sasha membership for £3.99 per month.
- Why Working Mums Need Rest Without Feeling GuiltyPeople talk about rest as if it’s simple. Just sit down. Put your feet up. Relax. If you’re a mum with ADHD, you’ll probably already be laughing. Because for many of us, resting… Read more: Why Working Mums Need Rest Without Feeling Guilty
- Working Mum Life: The Constant Battle Between Home and Work
People often talk about working mums as if we’re constantly thinking about home while we’re at work and constantly thinking about work while we’re at home. For me, that’s not really how it… Read more: Working Mum Life: The Constant Battle Between Home and Work